Witch Doctor

This is the result of me being really bored at work. Now, if this doesn’t scream “I am a big nerd” right in your face then I don’t know what will… but Mr. Witch Doctor insists that I post it up, so here you go.

(sung to the tune of “Thou shalt always kill” by Dan le Sac vs Scroobius Pip)

Thou shalt not be a corpse camper.
Thou shalt not slap or spit on other players.
Thou shalt not beg for money, boosts, armour, weapons, bags, guild membership or attention.
Thou shalt not think that any player that gives you free items or gold is a stalker. Some people are just nice.
Thou shalt not be a ganker.
Thou shalt not use any weird letters in your character name.
Thou shalt not jump off elevators.
Thou shalt not judge a player by their arena team rating.
Thou shalt not judge a guild by their progression status.
Thou shalt not buy gold online. Thou shalt not buy levelling services.
Thou shalt not tell low-level players to leave Warsong Gulch, Arathi Basin or Alterac Valley.
Thou shalt not be such an elitist.
Thou shalt bring your own potions, food and elixirs to instances and raids. Thou shalt not run out of arrows.
Thou shalt not be a forum troll.
Thou shalt not start a monopoly on the auction house, drive up the prices and ruin the server economy.
Thou shalt not return to the same lowbie town week in, week out, just cause you’re scared to play in your arena team that you’re never gonna fucking win with.
Thou shalt not put guilds, items or NPCs on ridiculous pedestals no matter how great they are or were.
Thrall – Is just an orc
Jaina – Just a girl
Cairne – Just a cow
Bronzebeard – Just a dwarf
Sylvanas – Just an elf
Anduin – Just a kid
Zul’jin – Just a troll
Arthas – Just a man
Nihilum – Just a guild
Death and Taxes – Just a guild
Ashbringer – Just a sword
Netherdrake – Just a mount
Outland – Just a zone
Northrend – Just a zone
Death Knight – Just a class
World of Warcraft – Just a game
Thou shalt give equal worth in end-game to players with offspec classes as to those that use cookie-cutter builds.
Thou shalt remember that engineering, blacksmithing and leatherworking were never profitable and never will be.
Thou shalt not spam “Krol Blade” on the trade channel, thou shalt not spam “Krol Blade” on the trade channel, thou shalt not spam “Krol Blade” on the trade channel.
Thou shalt not play on private servers.
Thou shalt not be a cave defender.
Thou shalt not scream “heal” to the healer.
Thou shalt not dance on mailboxes.
When I say “kek” thou shalt not say “bur”.
When I say “ding” thou shalt not say “dong”.
When I say, he say, she say, we say, mooooooo – kill me.
Thou shalt not tank without a shield.
Thou shalt not pull with a pyroblast.
Thou shalt not wish your girlfiend was hot like a male bloodelf.
Thou shalt spell the word “Please” P-L-E-A-S-E, not P-L-Z, P-L-X or P-L-O-X, regardless of what your native language might be.
Thou shalt not express your disappointment at the fact that your group wiped for the fifth time by saying “noobcakes”.
Thou shalt play for yourselves.

And thou shalt always kill.